By the psychological counsellor Safaa Al-Nujaili. Definition of fear in children: it is an emotional state accompanied by psychological and physical arousal that comes over a child when an external stimulus causes him to sense danger, and it is an expression of self-preservation and survival in a human being. Through fieldwork at school and contact with parents, it has been noticed that some parents feel anxious about their children's fear, which may cause the child's fear to increase, since the child unconsciously imitates those around him and fears what adults fear, particularly those he trusts. A kindergarten supervisor took the risk of bringing a frog in a box to acquaint the children with it, even though she is afraid of frogs, and when she went to open the box in front of the children the frog jumped, so the teacher screamed and naturally all the children screamed with her, and from that day the panic increased whenever the children saw this creature. We must distinguish between ordinary fear and pathological fear. Ordinary fear: a natural feeling that every person feels, child or adult, when the individual fears things that frighten individuals of the same age, and so we call it objective fear. Pathological (non-objective) fear: it is an abnormal, exaggerated and repeated or almost constant fear of what does not usually frighten individuals of the same age. Forms of fear: Fear of animals and insects: this fear is said to be objective, that is natural, if the child has not been used to the sight of this animal before. Fear of places: this fear remains acceptable if it does not take the form of terror and panic and of the forebodings associated with a place such as demons and jinn. Fear of the signs of death and what is associated with it: this fear is natural as long as their fears do not turn into obsessions that never leave their minds. Fear of losing confidence: some children are afraid of meeting adults or visitors, and are afraid of exams or of having questions put to them. Fear of hostility and criticism: such as fear of the feelings of anger that come over adults, or of their raised voices and quarrels, and likewise of being ignored or of having critical words directed at them. Causes of fear: Suppressing the emotion of fear: some fathers fear that their son will become fearful or grow up known for these feelings, and so they punish children when these emotions appear in them. Mocking the fearful child and not training him: sometimes a child's siblings use certain behaviour that frightens their brother as a means of amusement or of making fun of him in front of other children, bearing in mind that fear is formed within the child by his ignorance of the reality of things or events, and this is the responsibility of parents, teachers and older siblings. Frightening the child: some adults resort to frightening a child so that he will do the task they ask of him, so the child is told: we will put you in a dark room, or we will bring the soldier for you. Surrounding the child with an atmosphere of intimidation and unjustified caution will lead him to feel inadequate and to lose confidence, and then to fear. Modelling: this is that the child unconsciously imitates those around him and fears what adults fear, particularly those he trusts. Disturbed family circumstances: quarrelling, agitation, divorce, rigid parental authority, mistaken upbringing, fear. Methods of overcoming the problem: First: understanding with the child about the frightening thing: if a child comes across something that frightens him, he must not be helped to forget it, because forgetting buries the fears while they glow inside the child's psyche and become a source of anxiety. But reaching an understanding with the child about the frightening thing puts the fear at its correct level without exaggeration, so the parents help to reduce the scale of the frightening thing and to show that this is something every person is exposed to. Second: training the child to face the sources of fear after his agreement: for example, if the child is afraid of hospital, it must be linked with something pleasant such as buying a gift or carrying a bunch of flowers. Third: the parents trying to remain balanced in difficult situations: so that the parents' behaviour is balanced and free of panic and alarm in such situations, and likewise when the child is ill, because the parents' alarm transfers to the child and he learns to respond to life's situations in the same way. Fourth: observing a good model and rewarding its imitation: parents should accustom children to seeing people who do not suffer alarm or fear, while encouraging children to practise similar situations. Fifth: keeping the child temporarily away from stimuli of fear: such as gatherings where death is discussed, or the dangers the family went through at certain periods of their lives. Sixth: uncovering the sources of the child's fears: with the aim of correcting the child's ideas by looking for the source of the frightening information, and sometimes this source can be used to modify what the child is afraid of, for the child's information may have come from older children, or from the maid or his grandmother. Seventh: treating the child or treating the parents' fears: by presenting the child to a specialist or by addressing the atmosphere at home, for how many mothers afflicted with fear have transferred their fear to their children.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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