To be a mediator…

By lawyer Younis Al-Tahrawi:

Mediation is considered a process of intervention in which the parties accept that a third party intervenes to help them negotiate a solution to the case. Among the mediator's qualities is that he is unbiased and neutral and does not have the authority to make a decision, the aim being to help the parties voluntarily to reach an agreement of their own that is acceptable to them.

Neutrality relates to conduct, in that the intervener does not expect to gain personal benefits from either party, while impartiality relates to attitudes, in that it involves no favouritism, no bias and no discrimination between the parties. The mediator's role helps to ease anger by providing a suitable atmosphere for the negotiation process.

The mediator focuses on the parties' interests more than on their positions, and helps separate the parties from the problem. He uses techniques of active listening, for he is a good listener. He should be a model to follow, for he is trustworthy. The mediator should use balanced words by creating a suitable atmosphere for the parties to hear one another, and should alert the parties to the consequences of not reaching an agreement. He encourages the parties to make effective efforts to devise solutions suited to the case. He must know that he is someone who does not speak about others and is not a judge who decides who is right and who is wrong.

Mediation has many skills, the most important of them:
Creating a cooperative and constructive framework for negotiation, with the aim of helping the parties find a fair solution built on understanding one another's needs and interests.
Listening and reframing: listening aims at helping the parties understand their own viewpoints and those of others and at identifying their interests, leading to agreement. Reframing aims at providing a positive atmosphere for negotiation, away from tension and agitation, by removing negative expressions and restating them through the mediator in a constructive manner, so as to ease the intensity of feelings and to focus on the essence of the idea, leading to agreement.
Identifying strategic options to create flexibility, which include:
A separate meeting with the parties, whether before or during the mediation process, in order to let them vent their feelings away from the other party.
Preventing and interrupting heated arguments, by setting the rules and defining the roles and reminding them of the purpose of the rules if they overstep or break them.
Reality testing: this lies in examining the gains the parties will make as well as the risks and losses from not reaching an agreement.
Broadening and appreciating the vision of the future and the positive relationships required, by focusing on shared interests and future relationships, away from blame and complaint.
Framing the solution in acceptable terms, so that the solutions are framed clearly in a way that emphasises interests away from positions. It is required that the ideas and options be of equal advantage to both parties and not to one party over the other. Other methods may also be used, such as making use of a period of calm and rest, which gives each party the opportunity to assess the proposals, the alternatives and the consequences of not reaching an agreement; and using humour and telling stories and anecdotes, which aims at creating a feeling of relaxation and openness towards continuing the negotiation and reaching solutions. The mediator may also call on another person, whether before or during the mediation, to help influence the parties, provided that this person is acceptable to both sides, such as a mukhtar, someone of standing in the community, an educated person of social standing, or a friend common to both parties.

As for the stages of the mediation process, there are several stages as follows:
The first stage consists in defining the roles and the rules, with the aim of reviewing the roles, setting the rules and obtaining consent to the mediation:
In it the mediator introduces himself to the parties and gets to know them, sets out the roles and the rules necessary for the mediation process, and obtains agreement to these rules. This stage ends with obtaining consent to the mediation.

The second stage is hearing the story and gathering information. This stage aims at allowing each party to tell his story and express his feelings, and in it the mediator gives each party the opportunity to tell the story from his point of view and to express his feelings in an atmosphere of freedom and ease.
The third stage is understanding the viewpoints. It aims at helping the parties to hear and understand the other party's feelings and point of view and what he feels, so that each will restate the other party's words and feelings in order to verify the communication between them.

The fourth stage is finding the solution. Its aim is brainstorming, putting forward ideas and negotiating a fair solution.
In it the mediator asks each party to state the ideas, alternatives and proposals he believes represent solutions to this dispute, whatever their nature, in order to negotiate over them.

The fifth stage is writing the agreement. Its aim is to write a clear and fair agreement and to salute and appreciate the parties.
It is required that the agreement the parties reach after negotiation be clear and well defined, stating each party's role and when, where and how the agreement will be carried out, away from ambiguity and obscurity.

There are cases and situations in which it is not appropriate for the parties to enter into a mediation process, namely: if one of the parties refuses to enter into the mediation process; or if there is a violation of the law or of authority; mediation is unsuitable if the aim is suppression; and the mediation process must be avoided if there is a clear imbalance in the balance of power between the parties.

It should be noted that mediation is not a substitute for counselling or treatment, particularly when one of the parties is under great psychological pressure and rational discussion is not possible.